We’re taxed. We’re exhausted. We need to shut down. It’s evening TV time, and zoning out on super heroes saving the world doesn’t exactly save our world. Or maybe you are the one pushing on with endless to-do’s making it possible for others to have evening TV time.
Why is real rest hard to come by? Notice the reasons that pop up in answer to that question. Not enough time. Too busy, too much to do, overwhelmed. Pause for a moment and follow this reasoning back to its roots. Will you find there the instruction that resting is not OK? Stay with the inquiry. What is not OK about resting? Can you find that part down deep who took on that belief and ask where did it come from? You might find that part responding that’s where my OKness comes from…being the kind of person who works That Hard. Who gives That Much to others.
At the core, is this how we know we’re worthy? Do we exhaust ourselves proving it over and over? Is even the exhaustion that is the inevitable consequence of this belief itself a badge of honor?
We need our badges of honor. They are part of our identity. Identity does not want to give itself up and it shouldn’t. Our whole ship of state would crumble without the glue of identity. But check in with care and you’ll likely find that the ‘components’ of your identity were assembled long ago, under much different conditions than your current life scenario. Can we let the glue of identity soften a bit to allow some updating for present conditions? Can our badge of honor discover the absolute worthiness of the work of caring for the apparatus of our ship of state?
That’s what real rest is. Sensitivity to the requirements of the apparatus inside of which we live our lives, and responding accordingly. Because you are the only one who is ‘in it’ enough to hear the need express itself in body, mind and heart. And you are the only one who can install the system updates necessary to allow identity to embrace true rest as essential.
This shift is not easy. Nor is it quick. Updating those wired-in beliefs to represent current reality requires lots of repeated inputs of updated, wholesome beliefs. Also lots of practice of the behaviors that align with those beliefs. Having skilled and caring help is important. Fortunately, you can count on the plasticity of your system to work with you. The more you can register the sincere need for rest, the more your system will feel permission to rest.
This is No Small Thing. And there is honor in it.